I needed this now Kris to make me realize something that is going no now with me loving myself.
I had such a habit of self-sabotage and self-loathing as a teen it just took till my 30s to get out the habit. Self-love should be so easy since it is intrapersonal. You are dealing with you and no one else. It was only when I accepted I did the best I could do that life got better. Always wanting more and never being okay with where I am has never been a strong point for me.
I guess being diagnosed with chronic illnesses that I had no agency in contracting made me realize that maybe I am where I am by no fault of myself. I find myself being thankful for being diagnosed with my illnesses as much of a curse that having diabetes and multiple sclerosis are. They made me a kind better person. I hate that it took that to be a good person, but there was noting that I could do about it. As you say in this piece, embracing who I am now it and loving myself is my only health option I had.